Pattaya in Your Pocket - GentsClubs.com April Newsletter
- Broke Farang
- 30 minutes ago
- 7 min read
April was a weird one.
Songkran basically wrote off 10 days of the month. If you were in Pattaya you already know how terrible it was. The streets turned into a warzone, nobody was going anywhere and staying dry was a full-time job.
I was hiding out at Maggie Mays Resort watching the chaos from a safe distance.
Steven had the right idea. He disappeared to Koh Chang to escape the water fights. Ironically he spent most of his time there in a hot tub coding on his MacBook.
What he was building kept me sane.
I was stuck at the resort unable to visit the bars for fear of getting soaked. But I still had my finger on the pulse of every single one of them. Steven created a game that shows you in real time who is actually working that day and who isn't. I could see exactly which girls had checked in across every bar in our group without leaving the my chair. If you save a girl as a favorite (in game terms we call them girlfriends) you get a push notification the moment she checks in for her shift.
So not only did I have my roster to manage, matchups to win and rivals to sabotage, I had a live window into every bar we own as if I was actually sitting there.
Every drink sold across every venue was landing in my game account in real time. For those 10 days I genuinely didn't miss a thing.
That's Pattaya Bar Simulator
It's a fantasy sports game built around our group of Gents Clubs. The ones you already know and love.
Think Fantasy Premier League but instead of footballers you're drafting real bar staff from real Pattaya venues.
The performance numbers come from actual drink sales data. Your roster earns you virtual baht based on what really happened the day before.
You start with a team of 10 ladies plus a cashier. Without a cashier your bar earns nothing. Trust me I learned that the hard way.
From there you can draft in freelancers on top of your salaried roster and buy upgrades like bar stools to increase your staff capacity.
If a lady isn't working that night you'll need to bench her and put someone in who is. Otherwise that barstool spot earns you nothing. Roster management is half the game.
You pick a captain each day whose drinks count double. You compete in weekly head-to-head matchups against other players. You book themed nights and parties, stack synergy bonuses, and when things get spicy you can sabotage your rivals with dirty tricks.
Call the police on their bar, send the ladyboys in, hit them with a bad review. They can hit back. It gets personal fast.
There's also a real world connection that no other game has.
If one of your roster girls is working that day then go buy her a lady drink. That drink goes into the POS and gets counted in the game which boosts your bar's revenue directly.
When you're done for the night scan the QR code on your bill. The game converts your real spend into in-game currency.
Play well enough and you can earn a real Beer Card (or Spirit Card) redeemable at any GentsClubs.com venue. That's free drinks for running a virtual bar empire. We're not sorry.
The game is already live and playable with hundreds of players. Steven has been shipping updates daily based on community feedback on Discord. Features requested on Monday are live by Tuesday. It's about three weeks old and already more feature-rich than games that have been in development for years.
The community is a massive part of it. There's a dedicated channel in our Discord Server where players are trading strategy, declaring rivalries, requesting features and reporting bugs in real time.
The bar names alone tell you everything you need to know about who's playing. Chang Chang Bang Bang. Frodo's Ringfinger. Moist Taco. These are your people.
Watch the video below for a full walkthrough, then hit the link to create your bar and get started. It's free.
Start playing: pattayabarsimulator.com
Camel Toe Catering - Try us at your next Party!
Planning a party in Pattaya? We've got the food covered.
The Camel Toe is now taking catering orders for events anywhere in Pattaya. We specialise in finger food buffets, Thai food, mini burgers, hot dogs, sandwiches and more.
Got something specific in mind? Just ask. We'll do our best to make it happen.
The food you see in our promotional images is the real deal. We cater all of our own events so if you want to try before you order, check out our Events Calendar and come along to one of our upcoming parties. The proof is in the pudding. Or in this case, the scotch eggs.
We deliver anywhere in Pattaya. Get in touch on LINE to discuss your event and get a quote.
New Food Menu at The Camel Toe
We've been quietly putting together something we're pretty proud of.
The Camel Toe has a brand new food menu launching in early May and it's a good one! Snacks, paninis, Thai food, salads, all day breakfast, and a full mains section covering everything from Fish & Chips to Tikka Masala to Cordon Bleu. Something for everyone and all at prices that won't hurt.
Our kitchen is serving from Monday to Saturday - 1pm until 9pm so whether you're in for a late breakfast, a lazy lunch or a proper sit down dinner with great company, we've got you covered.
Keep an eye out for our daily food specials too - there's always something extra going on throughout the week.
Come in and give it a try from early May. We think you'll like it. The Camel Toe
Eat for Free Every Day of the Week
Here's something worth knowing. Between all of our bars you can eat for free when you buy a lady drink every single day of the week. No catch, no minimum spend. Just show up, buy a drink for one of the girls and tuck in.
Here's the full weekly rundown:
Day | Venue | What's On |
Monday | Maggie Mays Pattaya | Irish Stew |
Tuesday | Free Willy | Goulash |
Wednesday | Maggie Mays Resort | Pulled Pork Poolside |
Thursday | The Camel Toe | Lasagne |
Friday | Catflaps | Taco Fridays |
Saturday | Catflaps | Wings & Dips |
Sunday | Maggie Mays Darkside | Aussie BBQ |
New Rooms Added at Maggie Mays Resort
We've added two new rooms at the resort and both are freshly renovated and ready to book right now.
First up is the Corner Suite. A completely new room type! It's a cosy apartment style room with a separate bedroom, en-suite bathroom and two air conditioners to keep things comfortable. There's no balcony but at 500 baht per night for stays of 30 nights or more that's the same price as a standard room and you get a lot more space for your money.
Perfect if you're planning a longer stay and want something that feels a bit more like home.
We've also added more Ground Floor Rooms. These have always been popular and we've expanded the inventory to meet demand. Large studio layout with en-suite bathroom and your own private terrace.
If you've been waiting for one to come available, now's your chance.
Both room types are on the booking system now so you can check availability and lock in your dates straight away. Get in quick before they go!
Buzzin Pattaya Rooms – Stay Right in the Heart of It All
Prefer to stay more central? Buzzin Lounge has you covered. Their newly refurbished, double-glazed rooms are available right above the Buzzin Lounge on Soi Chaiyapoon, putting you right in the middle of Central Pattaya and everything it has to offer.
🛏️ Normal Room – 500฿ per night
🌴 Balcony Room – 600฿ per night
💸 Discounts available for stays longer than 2 weeks
💧 Free water, tea and coffee included
🧹 Daily cleaning service
Amazing location and outstanding value for money.
📧 For more info or to book, contact 247pattaya@gmail.com
Upcoming Parties
The Maggie Mays Agogo girls are dressing up and things are about to get interesting.
Our first big themed party (with many more to come) at Maggie Mays Agogo is a Cosplay Party and it's happening this Friday 1st May from 8pm until 4am.
The girls will be in full costume all night with sexy choreographed shows throughout the evening.
Here's the fun part. Customers get stickers to vote for their favourite costume. The girls with the most stickers at the end of the night win prizes. So if your favourite girl puts in the effort, show her some love.
Maggie Mays Agogo is inside the Maggie Mays Beer Garden on Soi Made in Thailand. Doors open at 8pm.
It's back! The best pool party in Pattaya returns on Saturday 9th May from 1pm until midnight at Maggie Mays Resort.
Free BBQ. Free shots. Wet t-shirt contest. You know the drill.
Come early, stay late.
We're adding new events all the time. Check the full calendar for everything coming up.
VIP Airport Transfer - Start your Holiday Right
Most people's Pattaya holiday begins the same way. A long flight, a busy airport, a random taxi, and an hour of staring out the window wondering what awaits them. We think you deserve better than that.
Our VIP Airport Transfer service is exactly what it sounds like. A luxury minivan, two lovely Gents Club ladies keeping you company, unlimited cold drinks, snacks, your music, your videos, and not a single thing to think about from the moment you land to the moment you arrive at your hotel.
One price. Everything included. No surprises.
It is the best possible way to start a Pattaya holiday and once you have done it you will never go back to a regular taxi again.
What a month it's been. Songkran came and went, the water dried up, and somehow we came out the other side with a brand new game, a new food menu, new rooms, new parties and a full weekly food schedule that means you can eat well every single day across our bars.
None of it happens without you. Every lady drink you buy, every party you show up to, every room you book and every transfer you take, that's what keeps this whole thing going and lets us keep adding more. We genuinely appreciate every single one of you.
If you're in Pattaya this month there's no shortage of reasons to come and see us. If you're planning a trip, now's a great time. And if you're stuck at home wishing you were here, well at least you've got Pattaya Bar Simulator to keep you company.
Until next time.